OMG! REALLY? (The Gym)

There are certain things that should fall into the category of common sense and should not have to be said. Apparently not.

I spend a lot of time in the gym (there's really very little else to do here except work, sleep and sit in your hooch) and have noticed that people have some really odd habits and work out practices.

1. Use a towel. Yes, you are suppose to get sweaty (it's even sexy on some people), but you are NOT suppose to leave puddles of nasty, stinky sweat on workout benches. Put a towel down to soak it up or wipe off the equipment when you're done. EW!

2. Wear underwear. Gentlemen, this is not REI. There should be no tent pitching. There should also be no airing out of the boys. I don't want to see it and I'm sure the other 50 or so MALES in the gym don't want to see it either. If you're going to go commando, wear longer shorts.

3. I don't know what you're doing, but it's not stretching anything. You know the baby birthing shows on TLC that show the whole glorious process and some poor woman is getting filmed with her legs up in the air holding onto her knees pushing for all she's worth? I saw a guy doing this one day. He wasn't pushing for all he was worth, but he was definitely in that position. Refer to the second part of #2 for why he should not have been in that position.

4. Ladies, what few of you there are: this is not the venue to be wearing your Victoria's Secret "exercise" shorts and wife beater. Some of these guys haven't seen a female in almost a year - be nice. You don't have to wear an abaya, but you need to be dressed decently. Cute, but tasteful.

5. If you're going to go to the gym, DO something. Or get out of my way. But either way, MOVE.

6. If you have man-boobs do not give me advice on how to do an exercise. I'm not there to meet guys (although I do like to look at them) and if I were, it wouldn't be you.

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